Your friends and family online would never lead you astray… right?
Unfortunately, I have been watching this happen for years now, and I simply refuse to stay quiet.
When I see that someone posts in a Facebook group: “Need a good divorce lawyer ASAP!” Within minutes, the comments start rolling in with names, phone numbers, and websites. Usually some various of “Call this guy—he’s the BEST,” or “She’s amazing.”
It all looks so helpful. So genuine. So reassuring. And I am sure that the majority of people responding to these posts have good intentions.
But here is what I have learned after seeing dozens of these posts unfold, after watching friends hire lawyers based on social media comments:
1. Not all of those recommendations are real. Some marketing companies and attorneys will use fake profiles to boost these posts and make them seem like the only logical fit. Is it ethical? Definitely not. But, even when the posters and the responses are real, the feedback is often not helpful, or it may not actually reflect the best person to help you in your particular situation.
Let me explain what I mean and more importantly, how to protect yourself when you are searching for legal representation online.
The Problem With "Who's the Best Lawyer?" Posts
I get it. When you are facing a divorce, a custody battle, or some other kind of legal crisis and you want the best. You want someone who has your back and who is going to fight for you. You want to feel like you’re in good hands, but you don’t know who to ask or how to evaluate your options.
So, what do you do? You go onto social media and ask the internet: “Who’s the best lawyer in town?”
The problem is, “best” doesn’t mean anything without context. Best at what? Best for whom? Best in what situation? Does best mean the cheapest? Does best mean the most awards? Or does best mean, just good enough to help?
Think about it this way: if you asked a room full of people to recommend “the best restaurant,” you’d get wildly different answers depending on palate, price point, and occasion. Someone may suggest a fine dining experience while someone else suggests a cheap taco truck. Maybe someone is vegan and the other has severe food allergies.
Legal representation works the same way. The lawyer who was perfect for your neighbor’s amicable divorce might be completely wrong for your high-conflict custody case. The attorney who crushed it in trial for someone else might not be the right fit if you are hoping to find peace and settle quietly so you can move on with your life.
But when you askask, “who’s the best,” people respond with whoever comes to mind first, or who they know from their own limited experience and not necessarily who would actually be best for you.
The Responses You are Actually Getting may be Deceptive
Here is where things get even more complicated.
When you post asking for lawyer recommendations, the responses typically fall into a few categories:
- The Well-Meaning Friend
This is someone who genuinely wants to help. They had a lawyer for their own case and maybe it went well, maybe it didn’t and they are sharing that experience.
The limitation? They usually only know one lawyer. They have no basis for comparison. They can’t tell you whether that lawyer is actually skilled or whether they just got lucky with an easy case. They are sharing a single data point and not an informed recommendation.
- The Attorney (Or Their Staff) Promoting Themselves
Another thing that I see sometimes is an attorney with not enough work, who has time to monitor Facebook groups and forums all day, may jump in and promote themselves. In my mind, I just wonder if anyone else is thinking that there is a reason that this attorney has all the free time in the world to monitor social media all day. Think about it: if a lawyer is so busy with existing clients that they are doing excellent work and getting referrals, do they really have time to scroll social media all day looking for new business? Probably not.
- The Marketing Company’s Fake Accounts
This is the one that really bothers me. Some attorneys hire marketing companies specifically to boost their online reputation. These companies create multiple fake Facebook profiles. They join local groups. They wait. And when someone asks for a lawyer recommendation, boom there will be three or four “different people” allall who recommend the same attorney within minutes of each other.
Yes, this happens. More often than you would think. I have had meetings with multiple law firm companies who have attempted to pitch me this fraudulent social media strategy. Believe it or not, some people actually choose to trick consumers with fake reviews or fake postings. One day (hopefully soon) the FTC or the Florida Bar will crack down on these fraudsters.
How can you spot this? Look at the timestamps. If several accounts recommend the same lawyer within a short window, that is immediately suspicious to me. Check the profiles making the recommendations. Are they brand new accounts? Do they have very few posts? Do the profile pictures look stock photo-ish? Do they only seem to pop up to recommend lawyers or other service providers? Do they only make posts when trying to market businesses?
What You Should Be Asking Instead
So, if you shouldn’t ask “who’s the best lawyer,” what should you ask?
You need to give people some context. Once you figure out what is best for you, then be specific about what you are looking for. The more information you provide (without oversharing the details of your case), the better the recommendations you’ll receive.
Here are some better ways to frame your request:
“I’m looking for a divorce attorney who is firm but not needlessly aggressive. I want to settle if possible, but I need someone who won’t get pushed around if we end up in court. Any recommendations?”
“Need a family law attorney with experience in high-conflict custody cases. My ex is extremely difficult to deal with, and I need someone who’s seen it all before and won’t be rattled.”
“I need someone with strong negotiation skills—I’m hoping to avoid court if possible. Uncontested divorce, but we have property to divide.”
See the difference? These questions help people recommend attorneys who actually match your needs and your approach to conflict.
How to Evaluate the Recommendations You Receive
Even with better questions, you still need to be critical about the answers you get.
Look at the timing
Multiple recommendations for the same lawyer within minutes? Red flag. Real people don’t coordinate their responses like that.
Check the profiles
Click on the profile of anyone making a recommendation. Do they have a normal posting history? Friends? Photos from actual events? Or does their account look suspiciously bare and recent?
Ask follow-up questions
When someone recommends a lawyer, ask them: “What did you like about working with them?” or “What made them a good fit for your situation?” Generic responses or no response at all? That’s telling.
Look for specifics
Real clients share real details. They will say things like “She was really responsive to my emails” or “He explained everything in plain English” or “She was tough when she needed to be but didn’t create unnecessary drama.”
Fake recommendations are vague: “He’s the best!” “You won’t regret it!” “Won my case!” No substance. Just enthusiasm.
Be wary of over-the-top praise
Real clients have nuanced experiences. They will say things like “Overall I was happy with the outcome, though the process took longer than I expected” or “He was great, but definitely not the cheapest option.” Also, along those lines, lawyers are not cheap. If you find the cheapest option, you likely will not be getting “the best” representation. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is and you should run the other direction.
Social Media Is a Starting Point, Not a Finish Line
Let’s be clear: social media can be helpful and I am not suggesting that you completely ignore your family and friends’ recommendations (about 1/3 of my business comes from former client referrals).
Think of social media recommendations like Yelp reviews for a restaurant. They give you a starting point, but you still need to walk in, look at the menu, talk to the server, and decide if it is right for you.
What to Do After You Get Recommendations
After you have asked better questions and filtered out the suspicious recommendations put together a list of three to five attorneys who seem legitimate and potentially well-suited
Then, schedule consultations with at least three attorneys. This is non-negotiable. You cannot know if a lawyer is right for you based on a Facebook comment. You need to actually talk to them and feel them out. The attorney-client relationship is a relationship! Most family law attorneys offer free or low-cost initial consultations. Take advantage of this and interview a few before making a decision.
Pay attention to how they communicate. It’s not just about them evaluating your case and explaining your options, it is also about you evaluating them for fit and compatibility.
During the consultation, pay attention:
Do they listen to you, or do they talk over you?
Do they explain things clearly, or do they use legal jargon to sound impressive?
Do they ask thoughtful questions about your situation?
Do they give you realistic expectations, or do they promise you the moon?
Do you feel comfortable asking questions, or do they make you feel stupid for not understanding?
These things matter a lot. . A lot. You’re going to be working with this person during one of the most stressful times of your life. You need someone you can actually communicate with.
Ask about their experience with cases like yours
Don’t just accept “I handle family law” as an answer. Get specific:
“How many custody modification cases have you handled in the past year?”
“What percentage of your cases settle versus go to trial?”
“Are you familiar with the judges in this county?”
“Have you handled cases involving [your specific issue]?”
An attorney who regularly handles cases like yours will have concrete answers. Someone who doesn’t will hedge or speak in generalities.
Understand their fee structure clearly
Before you hire anyone, you need to understand exactly what you’ll be paying. Ask:
What’s your hourly rate?
What’s the retainer, and how does it work?
What happens when the retainer runs out?
Are there any additional fees I should know about?
How often will I receive billing statements?
Trust your instincts
This one is harder to quantify, but it matters.
After the consultation, sit with how you feel. Did the attorney seem genuinely interested in helping you? Did they treat you with respect? Do you feel like they understood your situation?
Or did you leave feeling pressured, confused, or talked down to?
Watch for These Red Flags When Hiring a Lawyer 🚩 🚩 🚩
Certain behaviors should immediately disqualify an attorney from consideration, no matter how glowing their Facebook recommendations were.
Guarantees of specific outcomes
No ethical attorney will or can promise you anything. If they tell you that you will get full custody, or that you will definitely win if you hire them, or if they tell you that your case will be easy – those are all red flags. They simply cannot know that – they have only heard your side of the case and facts. Court outcomes depend on facts, evidence, judges, and a hundred other variables.
If someone promises you guaranteed results, they are either lying to get your money or they are not experienced or competent enough to understand the complexity of the legal system.
Pressure to sign immediately
A good attorney wants you to make an informed decision. They will give you time to think, to meet with other lawyers, and to consider your options. Absent something truly time sensitive (like a deadline or hearing coming up) if someoneif someone is pushing you to sign right now, today, without giving you breathing room—run!
One-size-fits-all advice
Every legal situation is unique. If an attorney spends your entire consultation giving you generic information they could have copied from a website, they are not really listening to your specific circumstances.
Badmouthing other attorneys
It is one thing to have professional disagreements or to explain why a different approach might be better for your case.
It is another thing entirely to trash-talk other lawyers, especially ones you are considering. That is unprofessional and tells you a lot about their character.
Dismissing your concerns
If you bring up a legitimate worry and the attorney waves it off without addressing it, that is how they will treat you throughout your case. Your initial consultation is the time when your attorney should listen to you the most! Your concerns matter. Your attorney should take them seriously.
The Lawyer Your Friend Loved Might Not Be Right for You
Here’s something else that’s important to understand: even legitimate, well-meaning recommendations might not lead you to the right attorney for your situation.
Your friend might have loved their lawyer because that lawyer was aggressive and combative—exactly what they needed for their high-conflict ex.
But maybe you’re hoping for an amicable split. Maybe you want to co-parent effectively. Maybe you need someone who can negotiate, not someone who comes out swinging.
That same attorney your friend loved? They might escalate your situation unnecessarily. They might make settlement impossible. They might turn a manageable case into an expensive, drawn-out battle.
The opposite is also true. Maybe your friend’s situation was relatively straightforward, and their lawyer was perfect for a simple, uncontested case. But you’re dealing with hidden assets, international custody issues, or a spouse who won’t cooperate. You need someone with a completely different skill set.
While I think the attorneys at TK Law are “the best” the reality is that there is no such thing as universally “the best lawyer.” There is only the best lawyer for your specific situation, your goals, your personality, and your case.
A Few Final Thoughts
I know this all sounds exhausting. You are already dealing with enough and now you have to become a detective, screening out fake recommendations and interviewing multiple attorneys?
Yes. You do.
Because the attorney you choose will have a massive impact on your life. They will influence the outcome of your case, affect your finances, your stress level, your co-parenting relationship, your relationship with your children and your ability to move forward.
This is not like choosing a restaurant for dinner where a bad experience means you are out forty bucks and an hour of your time. This is choosing someone who will represent you in one of the most important matters of your life. Make sure that they listen to you and make you look good.
Social media can absolutely be a useful tool in your search. Just use it wisely. Look critically at the responses you receive. Use those recommendations as a starting point and not a finish line.
And remember: you are not looking for the most popular lawyer, or the one with the slickest marketing, or the one who got recommended first in the comments section.
You are looking for the right lawyer and law firm. Your lawyer. The one who fits your needs, your situation, and your goals.
That is worth taking the time to find.